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Worship none but Allah, and to be good to parents, to near and dear ones, the orphans, the poor, the neighbors... [Qur'an 4:36]
Ramadaan has passed, the glow and after effects of Ramadaan are still with us and we reminisce about the wonderful feelings we shared in Ramadaan. We have accustomed ourselves to focus on improving our relationship with our creator; which we need to continue. We all also want to focus on what we could now do to ensure that we improve ourselves.
Care for One's Infrastructure
To step into the promising world of tomorrow we need to prepare ourselves to engage that reality today. We can only have a better world if we have improved individuals and we can only have better individuals if each of us become committed to improve ourselves. If we take care of our infrastructure, we improve our lives and enhance our potential to have a positive impact on the world around us. If we want to live happy and fulfilling lives, it's very important to tend to our personal infrastructure: We must ...
- Safeguard our Physical well-being
Our healthy bodies are truly miraculous gifts from Allah. We have been given the responsibility to maximize our health by avoiding abusive behaviors and practicing healthy behaviors. Remember, the Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) warned us that no person would be excused on the Day of Judgment unless he answers ... و عن جسمه فيم أبلاه how he used/abused his body.
- Pay attention to the Mind
Like our bodies, our minds need to be exercised, stretched and strengthened through continual learning, reflection and introspection. Keep getting smarter and wiser by keeping your self well informed. Perpetuate the spirit of اِقرَءْ
- Nurture the Heart
We need to understand and satisfy; as best we can, our emotional needs for love, friendship, belonging and fun. We must learn to cope with negative emotions like anger, jealousy, frustration, fear and loneliness. Aim at purification in all its dimensions ;
قد أفلح من تزكى
"Successful indeed are those involved in their purification." [Qur'an 91:9]
- Acknowledge Spiritual needs
From ethical and moral perspectives, we should contemplate the higher purpose and the deeper meaning of our lives - and try to live meaningfully. Make a condition that we
لا تبسط يدك الأ الى الخير و لا تقل بلسانك الا معروفا
Do not indulge in any act unless it is beneficial, and do not say anything
except what is good. [Prophet Muhammad (pbuh)]
Being a Better Person
The responsibility of a human being to be the most beneficial and least problematic to society begins in the closest circle of the community, the building block of society - the family. From there it extends to relatives, neighbors, friends and the rest of society
We are commanded وَاعْبُدُواْ اللّهَ وَلاَ تُشْرِكُواْ بِهِ شَيْئًا
وَبِالْوَالِدَيْنِ إِحْسَانًا وَبِذِي الْقُرْبَى وَالْيَتَامَى وَالْمَسَاكِينِ وَالْجَارِ ... ...
worship none but Allah, and to be good to parents, to near and dear ones, the orphans, the poor, the neighbors... [Qur'an 4:36]
Value Your Parents
The first in a series of commandments appearing in surah al-Israa' , Allah has decreed وَقَضَى رَبُّكَ أَلاَّ تَعْبُدُواْ إِلاَّ إِيَّاهُ وَبِالْوَالِدَيْنِ إِحْسَانًا
that you worship none but Allah and be good to parents. It goes on to say that ....
إِمَّا يَبْلُغَنَّ عِندَكَ الْكِبَرَ أَحَدُهُمَا
أَوْ كِلاَهُمَا فَلاَ تَقُل لَّهُمَآ أُفٍّ وَلاَ تَنْهَرْهُمَا وَقُل لَّهُمَا قَوْلاً كَرِيمًا
We should respect them and take care of them in old age, not to be verbally abusive to them; but to speak kindly and gently to them [Q17:24]
To express our gratitude we are commanded ...
أَنِ اشْكُرْ لِي وَلِوَالِدَيْكَ إِلَيَّ الْمَصِيرُ
be thankful to Allah and your parents. To Allah is the return. [Q 46:15] Remember;
بَرو ابائَكم....َتبرَّكم ابنائُكم
Be good to your parents, your kids will be good to you.
[Prophet Muhammad (pbuh)]
Value Your Children
Our children come through us but do not belong to us. We are a vehicle for them to come into this world and an amaanah/trust that we need to honor and nurture.
Many children are deprived of true love, coming from homes where the important adults lack either emotional depth or emotional expressiveness.
The worst person is the one who suppresses/distresses his family
شرُّ الناسِ الضَّيِّقُ على أهله ، ألرجلُ اذا دخل بيتهُ خشِعَت امرأتهُ و هرب ولده و فرَّ عبدَهُ ؛
فاذا خرَجَ ، ضحِكت امرأتهُ واستأنسَ أهلُ بَيتِهِ
That person who when he comes home, his wife becomes fearful,
his children run away from him and his servant hurries out of his way;
But when he leaves the house, the wife is cheerful and his family is at ease.
Train them according to their potential, empower them with the skills necessary for their independence, marry them to good spouses that meet the Islamic criteria (and do not let culture supercede faith); We must avoid the gender bias of preferring male over female;
من وُلِدَت لهُ أنثى فلم يَئِدها و لم يُهنهَا ولم يُؤثِرُ وَلدَهُ عليها ؛ أَدخَلهُ اللهُ بها الجنة
Whoever has a female child and does not bury her alive, nor dishonors her, nor prefers his son over her; Allah will enter such a person to Paradise. Infact, the Prophet (pbuh) said; "Whoever has two sisters or two daughters and takes good care of their needs,
كنتُ انا و هو فى الجنة كهاتين ، و أشار باسَّبَّابةِ و الوُسطى
Will be with me in Paradise like this;" and he put his middle and forefingers together.
Girls still suffer tremendous discrimination because of color, culture and marital mishaps.
So, Family First
The family unit is central to society because it is where social behavior is learnt and transmitted from one generation to another - it is the unit in which personality, reputation, and character are forged. Since the family is the primary group for interaction, it follows that a person's identity and existence is strongly influenced by the family system and the accompanying family relationships. Peace and stability within the family and family relationships are the foundations of future well-being for individuals.
By: Br. Sadullah Khan
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